The #mousepocalypse has arrived at our house. There are two mice, last seen scampering beneath the oven. We laid traps last night, and this morning woke up to find the cheese gone, but no trapped mice. This is war.

It all started while I was innocently watching the NLCS in the living room. Then I saw the furry beast scamper beneath my couch, and then run into the guest room. I shrieked, ran into the kitchen and jumped atop the counter. I immediately began calling, texting, tweeting and FBing the universe to alert them of my situation/predicament and solicit advice/help. Whilst sitting atop the kitchen counter, Beast #1 then scampered beneath my laptop bag, and Beast #2 poked his disgusting head out from beneath the stove. I was officially outnumbered.

My crying then went into full blown hysterics.

Then Beast #1 ran beneath the stove, and I kept watch from my perch until my friend Laura showed up with mouse traps in hand. God love her. It takes a real friend to leave the comforts of her home at 10 p.m., drive to Walmart for mouse traps and then come to your house to set them and sit with you until your husband comes home, so that you are not alone with the vermin.

So when Chad got home, he inspected the traps and calmed me down. Since I refused to set foot in the kitchen again, he made me a snack and then barricaded the kitchen with a wooden door we’d previously removed – those things wouldn’t be able to escape  and torture me in the middle of the night! Then we settled in to watch The Walking Dead.

After the show was over, we headed upstairs to bed. I passed the kitchen to inspect our brilliantly-laid traps, only to discover THE CHEESE WAS GONE, AND YET THE TRAPS HAD NOT SPRUNG. Those tricky mice! So we reset the bait and went to bed. I didn’t sleep much, thanks to nightmares filled with zombies and mice, and when we woke up, the cheese was gone again – and yet still no trapped mice. ARGH! So we called the apartment folks, they came to close up any and every gap I could find in the kitchen, and laid more traps.

You may have won the battle, mice. But you will NOT win the war!


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